Living the Lie or Being Honest – When to Choose

Every Sunday morning, I have the honor of sharing time with a collection of men that are the most authentic, honest, forthright, and sincere assembly that I have known. These men share their deepest thoughts, deliberating their successes, sharing their battles, and how to fight the demons encountered in their lives. They rely on each other for strength and the Bible for guidance and truth. These men have accepted their human frailties and the many mistakes that they and other humans make every day and are striving to become better men, better citizens, and do the work God has intended for them. I am always amazed that each man exhibits truth, honest emotions, and a love for the opportunity that has been given to them. You are probably thinking that I am visiting a Seminary or a Bible Institute. These men are in transition from being in prison to re-entering society. These men have at one time hit bottom and had nowhere to go. These men are drug addicted, alcoholics, and/or mentally challenged. They are at the last point where they can salvage their lives and become productive citizens. The next mistake they make will put them back on the street homeless, in a mental hospital, and possibly in prison for the rest of their lives. These men have come to the realization that today could be their last day. These men have been given the foresight to see that living lives that require lying, stealing, being dependent on chemicals and alcohol is not living at all. They have made the decision to be honest with themselves and with those around them. Once this transition from living a lie to living the truth is made, a whole new life is experienced. There will always be challenges, temptations, and ways to make mistakes, but this new life is more fulfilling, happier, productive, and rewarding.
You are now asking why am I telling you this. It may not be public knowledge but you and I both know people that are living lives that require them to constantly lie to themselves, their families, their co-workers, and to their friends. We sit next to people in Church, at work, at the Mall, or at the family reunion and see people that are hiding chemical dependencies, sexual addictions, abusive relationships, pornography, gambling, and other deviant behaviors. But if you were to ask them they would be offended and lie to you about it. Everyone is surprised when a friend, neighbor, or co-worker is arrested or their family falls apart due to some deviant behavior. How many times have you heard the neighbor tell the news reports “he was always nice, stayed to himself, and never caused any trouble.” The truth is that he was very good at covering up his immoral behavior and good at lying. The next time you are talking to your Pastor, or a teacher, or a counselor remember they are sworn to confidentiality in their dealing with Church members, students, and clients. These confidential horror stories are a burden carried with them every day.
The men I described in the first paragraph were living their lives just like the folks in the second paragraph except for one factor. The men in the first group got caught, fell off track, and hit bottom, and were forced to pay a huge price for their behavior. Those individuals in the second group for whatever reason have not been caught, have managed to function without too much colleterial damage, have had help from codependent family or friends to avoid or to hide the crash that is coming. If you or someone you know is a victim or is in the second group that is flirting with disaster please consider getting help from your Pastor, Physician, counselor, or friend. Tell someone and get help before it is too later. Vehicular homicides resulting from alcohol guarantees the driver prison time, chemical dependency results in many overdoses, pornography, sexual abuse, and other deviant behavior affects the perpetrator as well as the victim. Many perpetrators were victims before becoming perpetrators. Nevertheless, this behavior ruins families and carries prison time. Help stop the cycle and prevent ruining more lives. Speak up, tell someone, change the future.